Bringing Wellness Full Circle

Posts tagged ‘Body image’

You Ugly Fat Cow

Many, many women spend most of their waking hours thinking about dieting. Or losing weight. Thinking about basically trimming fat off of their bodies so they can be more pleased with the reflection in the mirror. Or healthier.

Many, many men spend most of their waking hours thinking about sex and how good they might look to prospective girlfriends/wife. Thinking about what to do to tone up, bulk up, firm up so they can be more macho. Or healthier.

So we work out and we pay attention to what we eat and don’t eat. And most of us don’t get permanent results if all we are doing is move more and eat better. Because it’s all backwards.

Because Life happens from the inside out.

But interestingly enough, we want the out before we get the in. We are so backwards sometimes. Investing into changing our minds, nourishing them, cherishing them, changing them, stirring them up a bit seems lame. Too labor intensive. Stupid.

Yet come to think of it, controlling and growing our thoughts in the right direction is truly the first pillar of change. Because we won’t ever live above our thoughts. And this is the one pillar that will cause all other pillars to be strong. And only when this pillar is well established can we actually change the shape and health of our bodies. Because everything in life starts and happens from the inside out.  

In my career as a personal trainer, I once had a lovely client who saw herself as an “ugly fat cow.” Every time she would see herself in my wall-to-wall mirror, she would point her chin to the mirror and say, “you ugly fat cow!” Probably three times a session. Or maybe more.

You ugly fat cow.

You ugly fat cow.

You ugly fat cow.

She said it, she believed it, she was it in her own mind. And you know what? As long as that is where her mind was, her body never changed. No matter how hard she worked. No matter how little she ate. Nothing changed.

You ugly fat cow.

As I gained her confidence, I began to talk to her about her thoughts and her speech. Eventually, we got to the place where she was forbidden to say “you ugly fat cow.”

And then she began to believe me.

She changed her mind about herself. She changed her thoughts.

And her body changed.

Thought Life

We really cannot live above what we think. 

Don’t you find this to be true in all of your life? If I think I am going to fail at something, I more than likely will. And if I decide the world stinks one day, I only see stinky things that at. It’s true in all of life, and certainly applies to exercise as well.

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So, I have to ask:

Where are your thoughts while you exercise?  Are you thinking about how much you hate it, how frustrated you are about not losing weight> Is your mind filled with “man, this feels great!”?   A negative thought life will keep you from coming back to exercise… It’s not that you have to smile the whole time; it’s more about being real, recognizing your crooked thinking patterns and changing them so that you can actually begin to enjoy your workouts.

Unrealistic expectations is also a form of distorted thinking that hinders you in the short and the long run/fun. And you know I’m all about having fun while we have to do what we have to do! So here is one key for you:  Give yourself credit for your successes, regardless how tiny they may seem to you.  Celebrate each tiny step, and you will surely build momentum towards more.  Every choice you make toward health is a success.

Do you make “white lie” excuses for your lack of discipline?  The weather is too bad, the gym is too far, my dog needs me at home… blaming external factors makes it easier to avoid taking responsibility for your choices, but at the end, you and I know that you are the one who will suffer.  Take a look at your workout routine, and try to figure out why you are not sticking to it.  Are your workouts too hard?  Boring?  Are you trying to do it alone even though you are a social exerciser?  Come on over to Barb’s Fit U classes, we have a ball! I always say that all you’ve got to do is show up; I’ll take care of the rest.

Do you equate your self-worth with your success?  Hmm… that’s a big one! When you fail at losing weight, you feel like a failure, and when you succeed, you tell yourself you are it?  Keep things in perspective: your body is only one facet of who you are. You are not your body. Your body image is not you! Got it?  Learn to focus on who you really are and not only on what your body looks like; and be patient with yourself—this is a new skill that takes time to develop.

You are you.  Your body shape may not conform to your definition of “perfect,” but part of growing up has to do with seeing your strengths and stopping the unhealthy comparison to others.  Your abilities are unique in many ways.  Let yourself focus on what you love about your body today!  Take a step back and choose to look at yourself as a whole instead of picking apart every visible flaw in your body.

Choose to appreciate all that your body allows you to do: walk, run, bend down, jump, carry, lift…  Even if your belly is a bit too flabby, remember that it is there to protect your spine when you move, sit or stand.  And those stretch mark? They are battle scars–so worth it!

There is a positive side to every negative, and by looking at it more, you will be less discouraged and less likely to not continue working toward your goal.

There is a Barb’s Fit U community out there!  Join us on Facebook and use the community. Together, we have gotten over discouragement, have fought cravings and procrastination, we have sweated and laughed. There’s just something about showing up and working out together… it changes us!

You and I know that the brain is hardwired to resist change, so show up and give yourself time to get where you are going.

And last but certainly not least,

Think about what you are thinking about\

I know that sounds so simplistic, but it is a key indeed.  As you notice your negative thoughts, seek to replace them to something more positive.  You will be amazed at the change in your thought life first of all, your attitude, and your body.  You are truly what you think!

End of the Year Barb’s Fit U Challenge Update

Ok, so there were 97 days left in the year when we started this challenge on Sept 25th. There are now 69; how is that even possible?

If you haven’t started with us yet, it’s not too late! Just read this post and get started!

I told you that I was going to ask you every two weeks how you are doing. In all fairness, I need to answer that question as well, so here it goes:

1. Get rid of 2 pounds of belly fat ( I have a NEWAY plan for that)

I have actually decided to kick the scale for a while (there is a blog post coming up on 11/22 about that), but I am diligent in staying away from white sugar and wheat, and it makes me feel great! 

2. Set up my new business venture (more on this later)

I am working on this 15 minutes five days a week, and it is slowly taking shape. I even have a page on my website for it now! 

3. Help my husband with his new business venture

We brain storm a lot and things are moving! You can check it out at Bulldog Cigars (He changed the name and I love it!)

4. Stick with Scripture memorization

I am coming up on 20 verses. One at a time, but getting there! 

So, I”ve been very honest with you here. Now it’s your turn! How are you doing on your plan? Coming along? Do you need to regroup? Let us know in the comment section. I can hardly wait, and I am rooting for you all the way!

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